Making her move

November 28, 2006 at 1:13 pm 21 comments

The apartment buying is going ahead. All is in order from my side which is great. However, there is one slight problem – the apartment is currently being rented out and the tennent has no intention of moving.

The current tennent is a lady who lives there with her three dogs. Yup, 1 new apartment, 3 dogs. Not a good combination. Hence the plan was to do LOADS of work before I move in! But she has obviously realised that no other landlord will take her and her 3 mongrel dogs who sleep on her bed. So she doesn’t want to move.

Which means that the seller will be starting legal action shortly. So hopefully things will go ahead and work out ok so I can still have possession in mid-January.

But my friends have started thinking about the alternatives. Obviously we can’t poison the dogs as I like dogs – although that would make it easier for her to find somewhere else to live! And although the place is a mess, burning it wouldn’t solve anything either. The best suggestion so far is to find some men who will go and knock on her window in the night and hide. Several times in a night. Several nights in a row. i.e. scare her out. Which isn’t very nice… but may become necessary!!

Anyone got any better ideas?

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Entry filed under: On trying to become a propertied young lady.

Floods Things I have learnt since I last posted…

21 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Leon  |  November 28, 2006 at 3:44 pm

    Kidnap one of the dogs, Create a fake decapitated head of it and put it on her bed while she’s sleeping.

    Reply
  • 2. Dr. D.  |  November 28, 2006 at 6:51 pm

    I’m a bit at a loss for ideas…all I can say is I hope she moves out in good time. Three dogs in an apartment??? Yuck….

    Reply
  • 3. Mad Bull  |  November 28, 2006 at 6:58 pm

    Doh poison de pore likkle dawg dem! Poison she!

    Reply
  • 4. Prim  |  November 28, 2006 at 7:16 pm

    Three mongrel dogs in one apartment is a bit excessive. (could never sleep in a bed with 3 dogs…LAWD!)

    I’m also at a lost…hopefully she’ll wake up and realize that she must leave the appt and legal action won’t be necessary. (Well, here’s hoping!)

    Reply
  • 5. Island Spice  |  November 28, 2006 at 10:20 pm

    Why people mus stay so? She need to find a HOUSE. Doesnt your place have strata rules? I don’t have any ideas how to get rid of her.. but thats only caw I am overcome by Christmas. If the new year dawns and she still ain move.. link me.. I have friends in LOW places. πŸ˜‰

    Reply
  • 6. guyana-gyal  |  November 29, 2006 at 7:17 am

    Duppies!!! Rent a few duppies!!! Get a rolling calf to visit too.

    Reply
  • 7. Kingston Girl  |  November 29, 2006 at 8:57 am

    Although it’s an apartment complex, it’s more like townhouses – ie I have my own little fenced in garden at the back. I think that means that the strata rules are more flexible. And I won’t fight any one for having a pet when they live alone – however a cat or one little dog would be a much better option than 3 stinking dogs!

    Where can i rent duppies from???

    And yes, I am thinking of using some contacts from ‘low’ places!

    Reply
  • 8. Cool Destiny  |  November 29, 2006 at 10:55 am

    1st Laxatives for thieving co-workers now murder by poison? Girl, yu evil yu nuh! I think if she is threatened with legal action , she’ll get her tired ass moving. People for the most part don’t like courts, lawyers, etc. I like the kidnapping the dog idea, only I’d kidnap 2 or all 3 of them if possible.

    Reply
  • 9. Marissa Bustamante  |  November 30, 2006 at 11:52 am

    How about, the present owner files the necessary papers with the courts. Things drag on for awhile and once the magistrate has ruled against the now illegal tenant, the local constabulary forcibly removes them and their dogs.

    No, that’s a stupid idea.

    Reply
  • 10. Gela Words  |  December 1, 2006 at 2:55 am

    Hehe, the comments for this post are so funny.

    You can always count on Madbull to give some great advice πŸ™‚ Is betta yu spend time in prison for murder than be accused of being an animal hater. hehe.

    Yeah, like Island Spicey, I’m filled with goodwill towards all mankind, so can’t think of anything evil yet. I’m usually cured of that malady, a week or two after the new years, so I should have some wonderfully, evil suggestions then.

    For now, I’m now I’m enjoying wearing my halo.

    Reply
  • 11. Gela Words  |  December 1, 2006 at 2:56 am

    Hehe, the comments for this post are so funny.

    You can always count on Madbull to give some great advice πŸ™‚ Is betta yu spend time in prison for murder than be accused of being an animal hater. hehe.

    Yeah, like Island Spicey, I’m filled with goodwill towards all mankind, so can’t think of anything evil yet. I’m usually cured of that malady, a week or two after the new years, so I should have some wonderfully, evil suggestions then.

    For now, I’m kinda liking how this halo look on my head, teehee.

    Reply
  • 12. Mad Bull  |  December 1, 2006 at 6:50 am

    Gela, think about it! At least 80% of the murders in Jamaica are unsolved! KG could easily poison the tenant and get away scott free! It just makes sense!

    Reply
  • 13. beaver  |  December 1, 2006 at 8:58 pm

    *evil grin*

    1. buy a colony of ants.
    2. train colony of ants.
    3. drive colony of ants every evening to appartment.
    4. colony of ants bite evil tenant every night, making it impossible to sleep.
    5. colony of ants return to you every morning.

    repeat steps 3 to 5 every day for a week. You should move in by Dec. 15th.

    Cheers,

    beavy the screwy

    Reply
  • 14. Strudel  |  December 2, 2006 at 3:15 am

    A CRY IN THE DARK – Characters : 1 witch reading an old book, 3 silent dogs, 1 victim (homeowner) .

    WITCH – ..homer, lawnmover,… homeowner ! that’s it.
    Boil a potato, glue homeowner’s pic on it. ..yeah… Hot needle, sting her heart … Her heart? not so soon. Let’s sting somewhere else for now. ZIp.

    ZIP … A loud cry breaks the dark of the night.

    (Next to come: The witch in the mirror).

    WITCH -.. ehy ..ppsssstttt, you biches, haven’t you gotten any suggestion for a poor old granny? eh eh eh-

    Strudel

    Reply
  • 15. Stunner  |  December 2, 2006 at 1:59 pm

    Hmmm, poisoning the dogs one by one and sending hey an annonymous note that she is next don’t sound like a bad idea, she might just get the idea that she needs to move.

    Hope you get your place by mid January thorugh.

    Reply
  • 16. Cool Destiny  |  December 3, 2006 at 3:49 pm

    Strudel & Beavy are hilarious!!

    Reply
  • 17. Strudel  |  December 3, 2006 at 10:56 pm

    THE LAST TRIP OF THE ANTS. TO THE PROMISED LAND. Characters: 1 witch, 3 silent dogs, 1 colony of ants.

    WITCH – And as for the ants, I just lower my pants.

    Strudel

    Reply
  • 18. Dr. D.  |  December 4, 2006 at 8:37 pm

    The lady and the three mongrels still in residence?

    Reply
  • 19. Kingston Girl  |  December 5, 2006 at 11:24 am

    Colony of ants sounds a good plan to me – as long as they are trainable and they will move out as soon as she does.

    She is still there… with the 3 dogs – so court action by the current owner started this week to get her out.

    Reply
  • 20. experienceaurie  |  December 12, 2006 at 8:19 pm

    dem breed a foolishness coulda neva happen a foreign!!! to rah!! cho!

    di oman need fi move and go live a country if she want dog a yard!

    Reply
  • 21. Irie Diva  |  September 19, 2007 at 7:14 pm

    leave it up to marisa eeh man, she is now like sammy in days of our lives back when i used to watch it in high school, struups

    anyway comment number one wicked eeh man, wat a freight!

    Reply

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I'm a twenty-something year old girl living in Kingston, Jamaica. These are some stories from my life.
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