Random Stories from a Kingston Girl

This is our busy time of year at work. As in our ‘lunch, what’s that’ time of year. Our all staff on the edge and anything will tip us over kind of time of year. We get through it by the thought of December. December is our nice month. The recovery period for the hell we’ve been through. The lets breathe, read our emails that we’ve ignored, open the post and actually smile at each other again time of year.

But not this year. We’ve been informed that at the end of our period of hell, we have 3 days, yes 3 days to pack our boxes, unplug our computers and move office. We were lucky to get the three days. We were asked to move in the hell period and it was only by explaining that that could lead to most of our staff resigning that the powers that be were kind and said that we could have 3 whole days after heel to prepare for the move.

Aren’t we lucky?

And what move is complete without bits of the computer getting lost (hmm, I might move my mouse myself!), phones being down for weeks and no internet for months?

Oh December 2006.  What a lovely time you were. We will think back on your fondly in December 2007!

I am in the process of renewing my contract at work at the moment. I wanted to be made permanent, but as a civil servant in the current environment, that wasn’t going to happen today. So a new contract it is. Now one of the problems of a contract is that you don’t get some of the perks you get if you are permanent, and I wanted to be sure exactly what I was entitled to… which resulted in the personnel officer and my boss getting very worried.

Me: So if I am on contract, what is the status re maternity leave?

Personnel: Huh? What?

My Boss: What? Is there something I should know about??

No there is nothing you all should know about. But hey, I’m a female and 30 is approaching soon… I’ve got to know my options!

I found myself in a meeting today saying the following:

1. As you are aware, Directors only talk to Directors, Officers talk to Officers

2. Surely you know the protocol involved in this?

3. Well, as civil servants, we all know that what the Minister wants is what happens.  

4. I will address that issue when you send me a memo stating the relevant facts.

I will know when it is time to move on when I stop feeling comfortable in my open-toed shoes, start to wear itchy suits and begin refusing to answer to my first name!

I have this saying that if you are not careful, Jamaica turns you into a snob. And it does it in so many different ways…

Example 1: Yesterday I had a flat tyre. Now, I know how to change a flat and if this was while I was living abroad, I’d have knelt down by the roadside and got on with it. But no, I can’t do that here, my car limped the short distance up the road to a gas station and got a guy there to change it and gave him a money.

Example 2: If I go to a big party or concert somewhere like Mas Camp, I’ll only go now if I am going to the VIP section – I can’t deal with the hassle and harassment in the cheap area.

Example 3: If my car is in the garage, I’ll call a friend to come and pick me up as I’m not going on the bus. And this is the girl who used to walk to the underground station, then take a train, then get a bus and then walk again to get to work when I lived abroad.

Example 4: I was in Notting Hill carnival one year, and was quite ok with the jumping up with anyone and the crowd reaching through the security at points. Yet when I came home and jumped carnival last year, not only did I pick the ‘uptown’ carnival, but I also picked the band which had the rep as having the best security people. And I made sure that these security people kept the crowds away when we went through certain areas.

And if you live in uptown Jamaica, you have to make a distinct effort to ensure that this snobby side doesn’t completely take over. To avoid joining in with all the uptown conversations that say Jamaica is going to the dogs, that say that everyone who lives below half-way-tree is lazy, that take for granted that you should never have to do anything manual for yourself which you can pay someone else to do.

I’m lucky – everyday my job reminds me of the problems out there, but also introduces me to people who are trying to make the best out of what they have. Hopefully that will help me not to let the snobby side take over completely…

We were talking at work today about ‘people who go a fariegn’ and the discussion went around to what their responsibilities are. This all came about because someone had been to a funeral where the relative from foreign stood up and said ‘Me always loved mi auntie. Even though I was in fariegn, she did always send me tings and look after me.’

Now apparently that is not acceptable and the woman who stood up should have been so ashamed of herself that she should have kept her mouth shut. For how can we expect someone in Jamaica to support someone in foreign? Things should always be the other way around!

They should send you…
… Barrel at Christmas
… Barrel with school bag and shoes at the start of the school year
… Medicines for whoever in the extended family might be sick
… Food supplies (as even if you can get them here, they taste better when they come from foreign)
… Clothes to wear to funeral, wedding, Easter Sunday church, graduation, court, hospital …
… Supplies in case of an emergency

And if they aren’t able to fulfil these duties? Then they disappear and never visit home. People can’t face coming back to Jamaica and having people think that they were not a success. As everyone knows, once you work hard a fariegn, then you will become rich.

Which is why people are confused by people like my friend who gone to fareign but her fariegn is to work for UN in Africa…. not really going to be sending back barrels from there!!!

I’m in a reflective mood today. One of my favourite bloggers has had a nasty experience - she has just been fired for what she has written on her site about her job. Now, from regular reading, I can’t really see what her employers are making a fuss about - she has hardly written about work, and what she has written in very general and names no one. But none the less, she is fired.

So if anyone has a keen eye, they might realise that a few things don’t make sense on my site now - some stories are missing bits and my 100th Blog Posting is now actually my 94th. She’s got all her readers worrying now…

But on a completely different note, I went to the Wild Wild West party on Saturday night. My friends and I did some sort of costume, going for the saloon girl look, wearing what I thought were very short skirts etc.

Well, once again, I have proved I am getting old. Our skirts were among the longest in the place! And no one had told me that ‘batty-rider’ shorts were back in fashion!

We had a dilemna when we arrived - we were parking and noticed a group of girls walking in front of us. And we noticed something very odd - you could see the string hanging down from the tampax that one of the girls was wearing - her skirt was that short. So what do you do? On the one hand, it would be embarassing to tell her, but on the other, I’d want to know if it was me before I went into the party. So we went for the other option - we told one of her friends and got her to deal with it. I don’t think that even when I was 18 I’d have worn a skirt that lenght!

I had a very busy day yesterday!

Firstly I was co-ordinating a focus group session for CARICOM. They are planning a regional HIV/AIDS campaign and wanted to test the message in Jamaica. So we were ensuring that people from across the country got to Kingston on time, making sure they got food to eat and checking that they had bus fare to get home at the end of it. The workshop was split into males and females as apparently you don’t get honest responses from a mixed group - the guys are showing off too much and the girls are flirting! Apparently the guys are usually hard work -they don’t want to talk and discuss their views etc. However according to the consultant, our guys wouldn’t shut up! They were all very keen to share their perspectives and experiences!!

Then I went shopping downtown. I haven’t been for a while and I like to go when i get the chance. Things are cheaper down there, but I also like to support the area and stay in touch. I went with a friend as we are planning on going to a party next weekend called ‘Wild Wild West’ and we want to dress the part. We were about to leave one shop when we saw their bargain section and found skirts. Well, something resembling skirts - they are very small but very suitable for the saloon girl look that we are going for! And we figure, we are growing up, there won’t be many more years when we can get away with wearing something that length so make the most of it while we can! And at the grand price of Ja $350 (US$ 1 = Ja $65) we thought it had to be done… So between that and the bargain prices at the wholesale, a good afternoon was had.

In the evening, I headed out to Port Royal for dinner and ate some excellent steamed fish. Kingston has been so hot recently that it was lovely to sit outside in the breeze and enjoy being cool!

So am kinda tired now - good thing that there was no traffic otherwise I’d have been very late for work this morning. And think that it might have to be a quiet night tonight, one of my friends is having a baby today so need to pass by there after work and then will go and do some sleeping!

I now know what people like to read - when I ask questions about clothes I get lots of comments! So I guess if I wanted lots of readers, I really should go down that line of thought…

To answer your comments, I chickened out. Well, we both did. Friday night, end of a long week, went out for a couple of drinks after work and couldn’t face the idea of the party. So had an early night instead.

But transferred the dilemma to Saturday night instead when one of my friends was having a party. So went to that with the man… and bumped into my ex. Which wasn’t much fun - it was the first time he has seen me with the new man (who is his friend…) so a bit awkward. But in case you wanted to know, I managed to do the the sexy AND sophisticated look that night. Which, as the ex was the one to end it, made me feel good! I don’t want him back at all… but there is that mean side of me that is pleased to see him looking at me as if he thinks he made a mistake…

On the other extreme, I had to do a presentation on policy to the Minister and Ministry staff this morning. So it was into the suit and proper shoes - which is cruel in this climate. At least the conference room was well air-conditioned! And it went well, especially considering that my boss was supposed to be the one presenting and he had to go elsewhere at last minute leaving me in charge… and that the powerpoint didn’t work. So am feeling very pleased with myself now and like I deserve some Haagen Daz on the way home from work as a a reward!

I’m back in Jamdown - tired, over-worked and sun-burnt!

Bahamas was good - the meetings were long and tiring, but the hosts made up for it with some good parties in the evenings… I have to admit to being very impressed with the Royal Bahamas Defense Force Band - those guys can move a party. However, their best moment was when they were playing music before the start of the official opening ceremony. This is a big ceremony, flags everywhere, people parading around, anthems being played etc. The last piece of music they played before the event began was a version of a song called ‘What Happens in the Party’ which is about how anything that happens in the party, stays in the party - so if you misbehave, no one will know. I am not sure what message they were trying to send to all the delegates!

Nassau felt to me like a smaller version of Georgetown in Cayman - very americanised and first world - not enough potholes or animals wandering around to make me feel like I was still in the Caribbean. And I did laugh lots at the t-shirts on sale with photos of Bob Marley on them and the word ‘Bahamas’ - who were they trying to fool? We had an offical tour one afternoon (by official, I mean heads of delegations in one bus, plebs like me in the other buses, police cars to escort us…) which took us over to Atlantis - I have never been anywhere so OTT in my life - gold figures, carved horse heads everywhere, fake lakes etc. It was truly amazing.

I also managed to get a day off on saturday where I found myself a day out on a sailing boat - bliss. Lots of food, amazing snorkling and good company - a perfect chance to relax and switch off. Moments like that, I love my job! I have now put that photo on my desktop to remind me that I love my job sometimes while I try to clear the backlog that developed in my absence…

Life has been busy - that tends to be the case when I am not posting. It also means that lots of things have been going on which would make intersting stories, but unfortunately all I have time for now is some very brief highlights!! I went on a Jamaica Geographical Society trip the other week to the Goat Islands. It actually was more of an ‘expedition’, complete with ancient ruins, smuggling routes, getting lost in a forest, finding our way out with GPS and being rescued by boats. Excellent time was had by all, with the day ending in a fish place with well earnt cold red stripes. Was on retreat this weekend with a group of young people. It was at an all-inclusive hotel complete with ‘authentic jamaican entertainment’, i.e. Peter the Fire Man. Hmmm, always amusing and our young peopel joined in the fun! We also had a session on HIV / AIDS awareness, complete with a fake vagina - never seen one of those before. Next week I’m off to the Bahamas for work which would be great aside from the amount of crap we have to do to get ready for it - I hate paperwork so if I see another claim form for a per diem, I am going to scream. So I had better go and rescue myself from a pile of paper which is attacking me… if you don’t hear from me for a while, it’s because I’ve drowned!